At the end of every year– and this is going back my entire adult life, just about– I think, “This year is going to be it. This year is going to be where it all turns around and goes my way. Everyone else’s too! Why not?” This while looking back on a year full of health struggles (I have chronic issues unto medical disability) and frustration, and generally recognizing that this was a year inhospitable to the kind of human thriving I see for us. Every year.
I’m getting exhausted with this.
It’s currently a hard time to be human. The Earth seems to be heaving with reluctance to keep us here. When we look into the future, it’s dim, and when we look back the past is tarnished all the way through. I think that once we exit our cycles of distraction it’s easy to feel depressed, defeated, a little hopeless. It’s easy to be afraid.
Most of this year hosted the Year of the Boar in the Chinese Zodiac, which is the last animal in the cycle of twelve. The Boar sort of signals completion, and there was much this year that crumbled for me, that ended. I lost my relationship, my home, and all my future plans. To be perfectly honest, I wasn’t ready for these specific things to crumble and end.
Year of the Boar is supposed to be excellent in supporting us in reconciling to the right path, in fixing mistakes, and in being direct and sincere.
The North Node of the Moon has been in Cancer all of 2019. North Node is a balance point that has to do with how the Moon is moving across the sky, and what signs eclipses occur in. It gives us an idea of what we need to balance while it’s in a particular sign (and its complement, the South Node, is in the opposite sign– Capricorn, in this case), which happens for about a year and half.
This particular balance point asks us to bring the lessons and abilities we associate with Capricorn over toward Cancerian energies. The structures that held us suddenly needed to become more agile, more mobile. Picture the tarot’s Devil card with its chained up humans contrasted with the Chariot card, which resolves opposites to develop momentum. Cancer is a sign of movement.
Where Capricorn keeps a litany of that which we do not want to lose, Cancer observes the never ending process where we are birthing something. We’re birthing right now, in a sense. Five minutes from now too. That doesn’t stop, we simply stop paying attention to it. Cancer North Node tears us into our next reality.
Is it just me, or are humans as a collective in a place where we know we can’t stay where we are? Structures keep slipping somehow, and there’s this inevitability to our intuition. It will not stay calm where it wants us to emerge different.
Some people are going to become more entrenched in their rigidity simply as a reaction to this flow against stasis. It’s a strategy with an expiration date. It is– and this is not just a commentary on Cancer being a water sign, and cardinal (active and catalytic) in nature– like trying to win an argument with the ocean.
In 2020 we’ll wrap up both these cycles, but not right away. Year of the Rat opens at the end of January, and the North Node doesn’t enter Gemini until May. I say this with white knuckles. This Gemini North Node requires a cool, clear head from many people at once.
In fact, 2020 says it loves the vision metaphor that suggests itself. 20/20 vision is clarity and precision in physical eyesight, and that’s what we can hope to connect with as far as our consciousness and perspective: more clarity, less distortion.
A huge part of this is going to be embracing a new level of confidence. The South Node brings us gifts that we can draw from without straining too hard, ideally. Capricorn has a confidence that we can push toward Cancerian luminosity and that intuitive, watery wisdom. This is great time to reorient into that dynamic.
May 2020 be good to us.
──── by Lync Dalton ────
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