︵‿︵‿︵ by Lync Dalton ︵‿︵‿୨ 18+
I started the QP: the Apocalypse Saga? web log in 2021, but the one-page format was starting to feel unmanageable at some point during year two, so…
ᓚᘏᗢ“
2022 – present
Posted December 31st, 2021:
A couple times in the course of my shaman work I’ve mentioned that birds were a little standoffish with me at first. I speculated aloud that it was something to do with having a soul lineage connection with the Nagas (I’m getting mighty rarified here, I know; bonus note on Nagas: it turns out those were dinosaurs. Have I been a dinosaur many times? Yes. Maybe you’ve ever been one yourself.)
This somehow became gossip in an online terrorist enclave I’ve never been to and would never go to? Um? I was alone at the time, so far. And why? Is that what the internet is like with the inclusion of corrupt illicit surveillance policies? Huge human rights crisis. Huge problem. Please do not spy on me.
(This didn’t have to get Apocalyptic. It was just the internet and stuff, guys.)
It’s been pointed out to me that if people were going to misuse surveillance policies they might possibly decide to check out an anonymous sex blogger who wanted to high five everyone. Apparently that’s been really bad for me because I seem to have kept my audience’s attention without meaning to. This is why I should have a reality show.
Back to the birds. I find it hard to believe that people are somewhere opining on what I happened to say about birds privately sometime in mid 2019 or early 2020. It is very nearly 2022. Please have mercy on me.
What I actually meant was that as a shaman, I often talk to animals as individuals or animal oversouls. Unlike with some shamans, it wasn’t a bird that first taught me shamanic flight, it was orca (note: since then I have formed significant shamanic relationships with great horned owl and scarlet macaw; later note: harpy eagle has asked to also be added to the list).
That’s what standoffish means in that story. I’m exhausted.
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Posted December 30th, 2021:
1) Yes, I am undergoing a plagiarism crisis concerning my work being misused by a number of people.
2) What I say is not for scripts: not for personal scripts, not for professional scripts (without consent, credit, and fair compensation). What I say is not for misuse.
3) If you have a project for me, please hire me or donate to me, and keep things ethical enough.
4) I am honestly so poor.
Astral communication is part of my life now. Woo. My latest theory: maybe there’s a certain thing about being close to me (just on what might be called a soul level?) that lets certain people astral project into my presence or similar. I think some continuities call it [redacted], and it’s like an Apocalypse tutorial-in-the-air service where I’m forced to act as shaman, doing a lot on spec and hoping that the right fiscal and career opportunities emerge, including getting paid for the shaman services I’m extending to people now. I’m doing portions of that in the sixth dimension, where I can sometimes perceive other people if they have relevant activity there, even if they haven’t ascended to the point of having integrated the sixth dimension. Double woo. Obviously I always want this [redacted] thing to be locked down enough; it is my real life. But in the course of things I talk. I talk a lot. And I’m a shaman. I’m a shaman serving and administrating a very broad and sophisticated metaphysical information network, a job that was kind of foisted on me. I talk through my problems and the Universe’s problems alike.
Sometimes I hear that someone’s listening in on me by this method or by others and that they ended up shoehorning what I’ve said into other things uncredited and out of context, sometimes even for-profit things, sometimes for other personal gain. This is plagiarism of my collected works project ~WEPWAWET~, which includes all spoken word “performances” by me.
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Posted December 27th, 2021:
You’ve figured out, I suppose, that I believe in the existence of real-life bad guys (i.e. villains of all genders). I used to not, almost. I mean, I used to think that there were so few of them that we could safely attribute most of the trouble in the world to confusion and ignorance– reversible problems, and that the good guys (i.e. heroes of all genders) had enough of an edge… probably. Although I admit that I certainly very much wanted to have the privilege of that founded assumption in my society so that I could dream bigger than good vs. evil. It’s the social contract, after all. I wanted it for all of us.
Concept: I think we’d do much better with fewer bad guys and more fun.
Most of the things I have left in my life are related to carefully-developed skills that I’ve honed over the years, paying particular attention to my specific talents. I understand in some cultures (like WASP culture) it’s considered possibly(?) rude to acknowledge your own talent, but I’m just not sure that makes for supportive enough people. Civilization is about supporting one another, up to a point.
Alchemy, for instance, is something I’ve been practicing spiritually for my entire life. It’s taken me that long to build my philosophies too, and it was hard, creative work. I had to learn emotional equilibrium very young, and I was diligent and nice about it. I’ve been studying formal Hermetic Alchemy for over ten years. I worked alone.
Something that’s good in relationships and interpersonal dynamics is to have learned how to dynamically generate positive neutral energy, so that the experiences that result have that flavor, which has its particular merits and strengths. Alchemists loved to have that. They had to get very far to master it.
Bad guys can’t actually master it.
I’m aware that alchemy is cool. Sometimes it’s all that doesn’t feel hackneyed (and yes, art is often alchemical, and the product of a certain kind of alchemy). If anyone repeats anything I’ve said about alchemy or featuring one of my other many hard-won skill sets, I want them to credit me. My statements about alchemy are coming from a skilled and innovative place; they’re part of my developed system. It’s a huge problem if they’re misattributed. There’s no one like me. ⁂
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Posted December 27th, 2021:
How much demand is there out there for me to have something like a ~WEPWAWET~ cultural salon? Is there anyone willing to help set something up like that?
I’m thinking of this as a goal in consideration of the principle that artists like to involve themselves in cultural salons, and considering the factor of how illicit monitoring of me may have already played a hidden role in culture by now. Not all artistic salons, literary salons, etc. get to have their own shaman/oracle, but it’s good to have a really, really good one like me.
Who’s noticing me? Hi.
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Posted December 21st, 2021:
Concept: I’m the most fun you can have without a literal spaceship.
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Posted December 20th, 2021:
Safety bondage tip: Crepe paper. Those thin colorful paper party streamers, sold in rolls. If you tie someone up with crepe paper– in reasonable amounts, mind you– it will restrain them enough, but they should be able to break through it easily in case of emergency or distress.
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Posted December 14th, 2021:
Friendly reminder: those who have not yet reached the age of consent are not having sex. And no one is having sex with them. That would be a form of rape, and yes, it’s a bad one.
(Ask me about the not-bad forms of rape and I will draw a blank, but this one certainly matters, and tends to be a bad mess for everyone involved, I believe.)
Relatedly, mainstream pedophile culture (distinct from age play kink between adults and distinct from cuteness and/or femininity examined through a feminist or sociological lens; those are different conversations) has ruined a lot for a lot of us in society. So has child abuse.
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Posted December 14th, 2021:
Great sex is mostly about chemistry and sensation, I suppose, especially if we’re talking about sex apart from any specific intimacy factors. Intimacy introduces connection and compatibility to the mix in greater amounts. Being very incompatible in bed or very compatible in bed both matter instantly to people having sex, but the amount of compatibility starts to be extremely crucial by, say, the eighteenth time. Connection becomes a keynote woven through your sex life once you commit to someone (or once you want to). The best sex feels connective. You decide to have sex in order to connect.
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Posted November 30th, 2021:
Vintage QP entries entry (I will feature some of my older writing from the old blog here from time to time, possibly on a rotating basis. If none are up now, some might be up later. Have a nice day.):
-ℚℙ-laceholder
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Posted November 29th, 2021:
A bunch of people in my life really scared me with very serious attacks and gaslighting (i.e. systematic and repeated lying, deception, and misdirection, which in this case was clearly coordinated), and some are still doing so. I don’t have many people in my life anymore, if I’m being real about it.
I still have humanitarian urges and actions, but I’m tired. I’m still a feminist. I’m not doing anything wrong. I still want the world to get better every year, but what’s been going on? We got off track. I feel like we got off track.
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Posted November 23rd, 2021:
ConTuesday Confession (by me, not someone else): What if I told you that a staggering handful of celebrities, high profile parties, and notable people seem to be in touch with me in ways that I can’t actually prove? Relatedly, I’ve been told that my old blog had millions of readers, but I thought its readership was much lower, in the tens of thousands or possibly hundreds of thousands.
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Posted November 18th, 2021:
Love me. Have my back.
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Posted November 4th, 2021:
It’s been suggested to me that my economic viability has been artificially thwarted (for years and years, ffs, in addition to my health limitations, which are significant, so yeah, this is as painful a subject as it gets) so that certain individuals can corral me into some kind of de facto sex slave scenario. There is no question that my lifestyle exactly resembles that of a person who has been corralled. No one has approached me about this directly, though. How seriously am I supposed to take these claims?
So this is the result I get from being a dedicated and conscientious blogger for five years? Really?
Oh, and some valid rumors about my sexual anatomy may be a factor as well.
This is not a joke. I am not joking.
Maybe this really is all going on over my head, quietly, behind the wincing nightmare that is my life. Economic viability is more attractive to me than death, I promise you, and economic success is one of my dreams. There’s no one else like me. I love myself.
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Posted November 2nd, 2021:
I’m a shaman and most of my conversations happen in strange ways or with strange things. My body talks to me a lot, and when it does it usually calls me “baby” or “my day”. These are the nicknames it uses for me.
I also get interactive psychic messages from people ranging from encouragement to declarations of love to offers to meet up with me later to rape threats to questions about the workings of the Universe to yet another confirmation that shady people are using my writing etc. for dating scam copypasta or whatever god-awful thing.
A life so Fortean.
Sincerely,
“My Day”
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Posted October 19th, 2021:
I wanted to get my old domain for QP back. It expired yesterday, and I tried to see if I could buy it again after having lost it in 2019, but somehow someone new got it instead. I’m not sure why they’d want it. I’m sad. I was going to point it here and feel home again. I don’t even want to talk about homes right now.
It’s not like I have so very much money to be blowing on domain names anyway.
Note as of mid December: The domain quizzicalpussy.net now redirects here. It’s not the old one, but it’s better than nothing, I believe. Feeling sentimental.
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Posted September 25th, 2021:
I’ve been extremely poor my entire adult life. I am passionate about writing and almost everything else I do, but disability and chronic fatigue along with serious economic abuse (particularly involving my creative life) have made money an excruciating issue for me.
Some people I’ve known over the years have taken it upon themselves to claim that I don’t want money. This includes members of my own family and exes of mine (the one called “Edwin Pomble” on QP being among them) who have seen me struggling under crushing poverty while doing my best for over a decade and a half. I cannot fathom what their motives could be, but the sadistic cruelty is obvious.
Of course I want money. Some of them say behind my back that I must not want money if Jesus Christ was poor, which is both bizarre and mystifying. In point of fact, Jesus of Nazareth wasn’t poor. He was born in a stable while his parents were on a trip because there was no room at the inns they checked out, not because they couldn’t afford to stay at an inn. Jesus grew up well off, and his ministry was fully funded by members of his community who wanted to invest in his work. ┐(‘～`;)┌
Some of these inhumane saboteurs I’ve met say I’m against fame. I think fame and I would get along fine. I need money desperately, and I very much want it. I think people should invest in me.
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Posted September 21st, 2021:
Truthfully, there’s a God and God loves sex as a general thing. This planet is a lot full of sex, what with animals happening here and everything, and that’s been a good vibe so far. You can’t do it dastardly wrong and expect to be approved of, but God doesn’t have this broad and sweeping problem with sex.
People are just sometimes embarrassed about it, and it’s important to do it ethically.
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Posted September 17th, 2021:
Good is attractive.
Love me and never hurt me.
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Posted September 13th, 2021:
The person or people I’m supposed to love are out there. We can be okay. This is what I’m believing today.
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Posted September 12th, 2021:
In my shamanry, I’ve heard from seals that they think otters are the scum of the Earth.
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Posted September 11th, 2021:
No one is allowed to be anyone’s virtual girlfriend (nor boyfriend, contact, etc.) pretending to be me nor pretending to be like me, saying what they’ve heard or seen me say. That is grifting or worse. What I say comes from a mind that I’ve groomed and educated to be a good companion because I wanted to actually be a good companion. I have relationship skills and good intentions. People doing that kind of plagiarism/fraud and those enabling them are hurting me beyond belief. I hear that they are being astonishingly predatory, not just to me.
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Posted September 11th, 2021:
It’s a serious problem if you feed your attention to child pornography and/or other blights that feed off attention.
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Posted September 6th, 2021:
My heart is so broken that my entire body feels different, like it’s curling around the gravity of some superlative hurt. My breath comes shallow and so sad.
It’s about how people have chosen to treat me. It is. It’s been unreal for years now. There’s not a valid reason for their cruelty. Know that I am human. I’ve been good.
I deserve good treatment.
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Posted September 4th, 2021:
I once knew a woman who decided she likes and promotes codependency in relationships because someone told her on Facebook that she was being oppressed whenever she saw someone warning people not to be codependent. This is the kind of mindset I can never bring myself to respect.
Some people actually seem to fetishize any chance to claim they’ve been oppressed, even while they live lives replete with everyone offering them comfort and consideration enough everywhere they turn. This over reason! I don’t get it.
Codependency, which is distinct from healthy interdependence in most respects, remains a toxic relationship pattern. It is dangerous to promote it.
The terrorist group who attacked my life encourages people to be codependent with terrorists. This is one part of their radicalization process. Don’t get radicalized. Radicalization is indoctrination into something that’s very toxic. It is most commonly associated with terrorism and the internet. Radicalization puts extreme and evil viewpoints at one side of an individual’s political and personal dialectic (the range in which they allow themselves to speak and operate), and tries to erode the other end.
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Posted September 4th, 2021:
Sometimes I’m feeling cynical lately, about people. But I know I’m capable of having a good relationship. It is a lot about skills and good intentions.
I am somewhat feral at this point, though. I was domesticated as could be before, considering the keen interest in slightly racy subject matter, but I feel a little extra outlandish now. I talk to myself for company. I can still be polite enough with others, and am, and can be resocialized nicely once a context presents itself, but I’ve been isolated and I feel it. I was down with a severe infection from mid-2017 to mid-2019, really languishing. I didn’t see many people nor speak with many people during that time. Curiously, mid-2017 is shortly after some of the most trusted people in my life started agreeing to betray me (temporarily?). A lot of my human relationships have shorted out since that point. They killed my dog, who was a true friend to me. Since then I’ve been passive aggressively isolated and stranded.
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Posted September 2nd, 2021:
My body shape and size have been dramatically distorted by a swelling condition over the past several months. The malady also causes me extra pain, extreme stiffness, skin issues from being swollen so long, and other annoyances.
I don’t look quite like me right now. I look like someone bigger than me. I think she’s pretty too, at least.
It is temporary. It’s running its course, I guess.
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Posted August 31st, 2021:
(I originally posted this on December 21st, 2012 on my QP blog, which is now down. Anyone out there remember this? It is slightly revised. It’s about the Apocalypse, more or less. Yes, I was more of a skeptic then. No, that day was not particularly dramatic, though come to think of it, it may have coincided with the beginning of an Apocalypse cycle or something, idk. Sure seems like an Apocalypse out here now.)
December 21, 2012 (a Friday) is the prophesied end of the world, kind of. Or the end of an ancient calendar.
There are three schools of thought about today. Some people flinch against some impending catastrophe where we all die a lot. Others have been meditating all year in anticipation of ascending to the fifth dimension or other various kinds of laser lotus rapture malarkey. Then there are the people who believe deeply and fully that today will provide a temporal bridge between Thursday and Saturday. I’m of the third type, myself.
But it could be the end of the world, you know.
When I was eighteen I swore I’d plan a big party in a cave somewhere on this date, just in case we hypothetically came up to the surface to find devastation and wreckage. Even then, however naive I was (and oh, I was!), this would have been a joke. But I think I thought at the time that future me would really go through with it. But I’m not doing that.
But it could end today. It could. Although this process will have already started yesterday in Australia, come to think of it.
Dr. Manhattan says that nothing ever ends, but in exactly the same way everything ends, and the world can end today. I promise you. We can make it end. In fact, we may be the only force that can.
What if, on this day when urban legends and misinformation stir up expectations for old things to pass away, we all rode on that just enough to really change things and remake the world? Our world is currently more than a little dysfunctional, you may have noticed. What if we decided that we have new priorities: caring for one another better, respecting love and sincerity more than cynicism, forgiving some, employing reason much, setting the right limits, and letting go of fear and prejudice… really being truly excellent to each other? And partying on. These priority shifts could be achieved in a day if we really wanted that, couldn’t they?
Why can’t today be the end of a world where murder and exploitation and the myriad other messed up garbage humans can sometimes come up with are normal? Why can’t we, as a species, choose today to stop being assholes to each other for good and all? Why can’t it be the beginning of getting really serious about cooperation and mutual acceptance and problem solving aimed at the real problems?
There’s no reason we couldn’t choose to prove prophecies of positive change correct. Wouldn’t that be the most interesting thing to do?
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Posted August 29th, 2021:
I started figuring out in the mid 2010s that some of the people I knew were prone to be self-absorbed (and massively overly privileged, tbh) little asshats (e.g. a lot of self-entitlement, a lot of lashing out due to minor anxieties, a lot of whining, a lot of baseless sanctimony, etc…). It was exasperating. Toughen up, guys, I’d think. By 2018 I was sadly suspecting I had a bunch of nonstarters in the mix, based on people’s attitudes and treatment of me as well as an energetic sense of toxicity that was very obviously building.
But I remained very nice and polite (I don’t even like criticizing people, but I should probably mention it now and vent this much, anyway, in light of how the sort of frivolous spinning out I witnessed seems to have affected so much out there), and I pursued the development of my philosophies with the art of proper perspective in mind. Despite struggling through life as a disabled immigrant myself, and having much less privilege than others while many of them continued to claim to be liberal and mindful of privilege, I was extremely careful with them. They got a lot of comfort from me over the years, a lot of them. Many of them have been revealed to have a staggering sense of self-entitlement in terms of stealing from me, and I’ve experienced and heard rumors of their violence.
They have the wrong perspective. I can confidently say that now. I’m a social free agent at this point, and I do want them to make things up to me. Their past abuse of me does not just go away. Nor does it define me.
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Posted August 27th, 2021:
When I was writing QP I used to use the second person “you” a lot. I was literally writing to you.
Terrorists have made me afraid to do that now. My life is so different.
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Posted August 24th, 2021:
A person with a famously lavish lifestyle ruthlessly attacked my lifestyle in order to gain control over me. This has been going on for years. I started off as a poor disabled woman. Things are even worse for me now.
He has indicated to me that he wanted me to be totally powerless and stranded so that he could come collect me at his convenience for a romantic relationship.
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Posted August 24th, 2021:
I hate talking about my life lately. I get so upset.
I want to talk about how things can get better, but then of course I need them to.
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Posted August 14th, 2021:
The cordless phones where I’m living have a digital display on the front for caller ID. There’s a character limit, so when the system thinks that a call might be spam it displays “Potential Spa”. It cuts off the m.
I was wondering if anyone with that model of phone and caller ID service ever picks up the phone when it’s spam thinking it’s an actual spa named Potential Spa calling. Like “Oh hello. Did I win a day at a spa?”.
My shaman powers say yes. Yes they have. Many have picked up the phone thinking it’s a spa (possibly a spa & salon) and discovered that it is in fact spam.
Potential Spa!
Potential!
You’ll love our cotton candy sauna.
Potential!
Get pampered by our nail consultants.
Potential!
Potential Spa!
(That’s the voiceover spot I made up for them. This is what fun is left to me in life, apparently.)
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Posted August 9th, 2021:
One of the men claiming to want to know me has said that he’s both beauty and the beast in our story. And I’m kind of just going, “Hey, is there some kind of room for me in this love story? I’d appreciate it.”
But then I realize that I am Beauty in the story if you compare it to Beauty and the Beast, he just means that he’s very beautiful. He looks beautiful, I can confirm. I’ve seen him in movies.
We’re not getting into the Beast part too much right now.
Also we’ve never met, nor even spoke in a way that I can easily prove. That’s how postmodern.
I do need someone to come through for me. I need someone to be a hero for me in all this mess.
But I don’t know about him. I’ve seen and read multiple versions of Beauty and the Beast, and the beast in that one doesn’t put a patch on what sort of vile bullshit this guy has been doing. It’s bad. Does he like, transform into decent at some point? If not I can’t do this.
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Posted August 5th, 2021:
Trauma shutdowns are highly stressful on my body.
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Posted August 3rd, 2021:
I really hate cruelty.
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Posted July 29th, 2021:
My life situation is very desperate. I wrote that somewhere recently. I’m so sad about this. Really, it got this way through extremely malicious attacks on me and my life. One example: my dog was killed maliciously. Did I ever tell you guys about Digit? I miss him every day.
He was on my side and they knew it.
I’m desperate in the sense that things are desperate. I still respect myself totally.
I haven’t had a date with someone new since 2012. I was in a serious relationship for most of the time since then, and it was the wrong relationship. That ended in 2019.
I’ve been isolated in my life at this time by economic and logistical tactics wielded by others maliciously. I don’t really know why, by the way. I don’t. In some senses, I seem to have no one. In some, I definitely have no one. I didn’t declare war on them. I know that evil is wrong, though. I’m dizzied by how much cruelty. I feel so sad.
And I’m wondering if anyone will ever hold me again. In real life.
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Posted July 25th, 2021:
Spontaneous quote roundup (ongoing list, last updated 1/10/22):
me, to the disrespectful: I wish I could tip you over like mosquito larvae, and make sure you never happen.
me: Wrong is wrong for me. Wrong is wrong for me!
me, remembering me before the terrorism crisis: I have so much fun being a social creature, oh my God…
(note: I cannot be a social creature around people with bad intentions toward me. I don’t want to be invited to your gaslighting LARP.)
me, understating the matter: There’s kind of this huge issue right now. Where I’m a damsel in distress.
astral visitor (on receiving band): Baby, you have evil ex boyfriends.
me: I really don’t like it.
(note: A large percentage of my astral contacts call me “baby”. A lot of them are scary. I need someone to be marvelous to me.)
me: I want to work with exceptional people and do (and benefit from doing) exciting, lucrative things.
me: You can’t appropriate my poem so hard that I can’t say it anymore.
me: …Who told you that you could do that?
me, on the state of the world: I feel like I should have a gibbering session, with how mayhem everything feels.
(note: I didn’t do it.)
me, catching myself getting weepy sounding: I’m sorry. I get bullied too much, it’s obvious.
me: I remember commercials from the 1980s. They had a lot of like, crashy sounds and stuff.
me: Because nature abhors a brat..
dog: they’re vacuums.
me, gesturing: Collapse the brats!
me: What kind of scum of the Earth does dating scams and calls it a living?
me, pushing around pasta on a plate: Maybe I’ll move to America, and pursue the American Dream. Wait. I’m already there.
(note: What next?)
me, on terrorist sensibilities: Throwing a Molotov cocktail is easier than making a world class wine. That doesn’t mean it’s worth it.
me, on one of the many reasons I never manipulate people: I have no interest in keeping up a manipulation regimen with someone. Not even once. I really do have Chronic Fatigue.
(note: I have noticed that people hemorrhage a lot of energy on this kind of thing, on all sides.)
(note: Which is not to say that we should let random people with Chronic Fatigue manipulate us into thinking it’s totally impossible to manipulate people while struggling with Chronic Fatigue, though. Priorities and self awareness are factors here.)
me, to my shamanry clients: Let’s all become avatars and go to Burning Man.
(note: I’m already an avatar, so we know it can be done.)
me: The 1990s were so excited. I liked it.
astral visitor (on receiving band): Me too.
me: It was like people were just figuring out what buzz is.
me, on having a cultural salon: I’m ready to be an Andy Warhol amount of whatever you need specifically, and it’ll be cool enough.
me, on people being worse human beings than average: Why be the worst people in the world? And, if there have to be worst people in the world, can you be less tacky about the important things?
(note: It’s really important that the worst people in the world not let themselves get too petty. It’s also important they avoid losing their humanity to evil. Think of the bell curve.)
me: Human dignity obviously includes extending human dignity to me.
astral visitor (on receiving band): You have the worst life I’ve ever heard of.
me: It’s really bad…
(note: I’m a really good person and everything.)
me, on manipulation: I don’t (to my knowledge) know how to manipulate people. I don’t try. Instead, I’m honest about things (including what I need and that all human beings should maintain some honor). I prefer to use my strategic capabilities for the best things.
(note: I don’t manipulate people. I will continue to think it’s beneath me. I actually believe that my opinions are good and hold water, which is different from taking one’s neuroses out on people. Nor do I want to be manipulated. Manipulation is not the best. What is it really doing?)
me, on how most shamans who have shamanic flight were taught by a bird animal guide: Yeah, it’s really just about a Bran amount of you already get it.
astral visitor (on receiving band): If the road to hell is paved with good intentions?
me: I don’t know why they were doing that with them…
me, on ketchup: Do you think Catalina dressing is ketchup for salad?
me, on art: Do you think Vantablack is photoshop?
me, on my society’s ills: Things have gotten Gotham bad. Things should never be allowed to get Gotham bad.
me, on philosophers: I proofread, as the philosophers do, after I have first displayed something.
me, on widespread crises: Where my badasses at?
me, on class: So, people with high privilege have an obligation to do what’s right for their society at all levels, and this includes the richness of their culture. That’s noblesse oblige.
(note: Noblesse oblige is part of any social contract.)
(note: I am the least privileged person I’ve ever met if I am being de facto enslaved.)
me, on trauma: Hip hop helps the human body process trauma. So does Dubstep. It has to do with many elements of the music.
(note: I love Hip hop and Dubstep.)
(note: And Ambient can be good for anxiety.)
me, with a fair request: Stop giving malicious opportunists a say in my life, people who have my life in your hands.
me, on loving Dubstep: Why were we not supposed to like Dubstep again? Or was I misinterpreting the conversation?
me, on depravity: Is it worth it golf clapping whilst watching people become terrorists? I think not.
me: Is this website in the magical realism genre, or is that just for fiction? I wanted to know.
me: Pedophilia is a non-starter for me. It will always be a non-starter for me. Please respect that.
me: This is my life now. It’s the website about me.
me, on my true and valid modern myth: I know this is a feminist narrative, in addition to anything else it’s really saying.
me, on feminism: I have always been extremely respectful to women both publicly and privately.
(note: I actually do not personally know anyone who’s done better at this than me.)
me, thinking about alchemists: Are there people who do clockmaking as a hobby?
me: Theoretically, some people want to have initiations into my sexual mysteries, which are a branch of my Mystery School, as a personal shaman and philosopher.
me: I’m about as seductive as a palm stone.
me, about a long-standing Illuminati prophecy I heard about in 2019 and how it’s about me: The Moonchild was supposed to be helpful sex girl…
(note: The Moonchild was also expected to be psychic, an artist, and the third daughter of the third daughter and the third son of their respective families.)
(note: I am the third daughter. My mother was the third daughter of her family. My father was the third son of his.)
me, slapdash explaining octaves: You know, when they’re like, the same note but they’re a different note?
me, on astral reactions to me in general: I’m the ghost of your future fun, pretty much.
(note: I am still alive, and not a real ghost. I think I have had death episodes and resurrections multiple times, though. Now how about that fun?)
me, to those exploiting me: What are you going to do for me for making you and your relationships more resilient and successful through entirely peaceful and entertaining means? What are you going to do for the world?
(note: This is about forced and stolen specialized labor and other unacceptable circumstances that have been foisted on me because I am skilled, talented, and vulnerable.)
me, on TalentBall: That’s not what TalentBall’s about at all…
me: I have archetypal content in my shamanry.
me: ~WEPWAWET~: we’re having a good time!
me, on my underground popularity: I want to be a breakout crossover superstar.
me, on improvements: Better is better. Let’s see if things get better!
me: I’ve been living trying to be an example of dharma this whole time. Since before I started studying it in the internet age.
(note: Personal dharma is pursued. Collective dharma is achieved.)
me: Do doublets make men look more attractive? Like in general. I think they might? If everyone wore them? I love it.
me: I mean seriously high quality doublets.
(note: For context, I was looking at that one self portrait of Dürer, thinking, “Would any other outfit make this guy look any better?” and it really just didn’t seem like it at the time.)
astral visitor to me (mid-2021): Your face looks like an actress that no one’s seen before.
(note: I took this as a nice compliment.)
me: Please do not siphon my intellectual property, including things I edit out. Anything I’ve written and editing out is unpublished ~WEPWAWET~ content, and I’m clearly workshopping it.
(note: And if I’m a compelling cultural force in English or the internet, I want to be rewarded for it appropriately. That’s an artist. What’s been our relationship since classic internet, humanity?)
(Spontaneous quote roundup page)
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Posted July 25th, 2021:
If you are spoiled, your ability to feel pleasure may be somewhat inhibited. It’s a matter of incorrect calibration. It is not that difficult to recalibrate.
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Posted July 24th, 2021:
I am a shaman. A girl shaman. The work I do is extremely involved with the kind of things I used to associate with speculative fiction: magic, talking to animals and channeling them being hilarious, talking to astral visitors, contacting the dead. Did I want to be skeptical about these things, particularly? Like, for any specific reason or actual preference? I did not.
I’ve been doing tons of magical cleanup from an absolutely ghastly magical clusterfuck that was perpetrated by a bunch of terrorist frenzies and absolutely no magical logic to be found anywhere in the mix. Think of it like a bizarre temporary glitch (note: glitches of that sort really aren’t allowed, and are again impossible). I have been through so much hassle with that stuff, and I’ve come to understand that many people, places, and things have been disastrously affected by that clusterfuck over the past several years (and to a certain extent, I may be clearing curses for some time to come). Things got run amok.
If you are a skeptic, I think you should decide to believe in magic so you can thank me properly. It’s actually been that intense. If you’re clearer on things now than you were a year ago, I think I’m why, at least somewhat. Magical cleanup.
Fun fact: Sex (reminder: between adults) has gotten 48% better on average since I’ve been doing this (about a year straight). It had been seriously messed with.
Who all noticed? I’m honestly expecting some kind of return on this constant effort soon.
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Posted July 24th, 2021:
Sexual health is a major issue in society right now. Are people talking about it enough? There’s a terrorist group active in North America and (I think) Britain that has been promoting dangerous and reckless sexual health habits.
It is actual that I love it when people have good routines of getting STI (STD) panels, getting medical treatment for the STIs they have, and using barrier protection like condoms. It promotes a warm feeling of safety and courtesy in an interpersonal atmosphere.
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Posted July 24th, 2021:
I’m explaining on Weirdo Camp lately about how hard things are for me right now, what I’m doing, and what I want to be doing next. I’m talking about real problems that I think are affecting the entire world.
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Posted July 23rd, 2021:
My postmodern boyfriend is an idea that someone can have a real relationship with me astrally, which maybe they can? But not much. I need a real person in my life, is what I know. The idea has been kicked around (maybe, along with my heart) by several real people, all of whom live in other states or countries. That’s how postmodern. This is a long story.
It’s not clear that I know what I’m doing in this particular matter, and no one wants to be stuck in postmodernity. Ugh.
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Posted July 23rd, 2021:
I am currently going through serious health things. I have existing chronic illness lo these many years (involving chronic fatigue and chronic pain), and I’ve been through very serious longterm violence recently (I’m a torture victim right now, trying to get free and to survive), and it’s cost me a lot in terms of health (and a lot else). I’m working toward healing myself all the time. It’s a lot.
I’m doing shamanry all day too.
And meanwhile I’m trying to create this website experience for people, and I want it to do a lot of good in the world. I’m doing my best. I’m doing my best.
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Posted July 22nd, 2021:
This page is sort of a continuation of my old blog, Quizzical Pussy, which was active from 2009-2014. In 2014 a Canadian citizen I’d been dating trafficked me to Canada. I immigrated there legally, but the man had very bad motives despite swearing to his good intentions and devotion to me, and I stopped writing my blog amidst a lot of personal difficulty. He and members of his family violated me in many ways. I was very confined and isolated, and after he got too violent with me I finally escaped back to the United States with my life. My ex stole and leaked much of my old blog’s content, which quickly fell into the hands of his terrorist group that he started without my knowledge nor consent. I lost my QP blog and domain in 2019 due to financial constraints and bullying. All I knew was that there were people who wanted it gone, and I felt pressured. They were already exploiting me.
I realize that I used to sugarcoat way too much on my old blog, especially people. I described many of the people in my life like they were the coolest people I could imagine them to be, and this ended up backfiring, I’m told. Truth is, they weren’t good to me, and then it got even worse than that. I’m a positive and encouraging person. I really liked having people in my life at all, and I did think that anyone hanging out with me must be cool. It’s not really like that, though. I was naive about what mistakes those individuals were capable of making. And I gave absolutely everyone props and internet high fives whenever possible.
I miss my old blog, though. Eventually I’ll restart ConTuesdays, is what I think.
What else is new? Um, I haven’t been physically intimate with another person in two years. It’s because of systematic abuse and torture stuff. I’ve been very isolated, even since returning to the States.
I am very sad that things have gotten to be this way. I wanted to have a life. I still want one.
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Posted July 20th, 2021:
My research indicates that the Delphic Oracle was both a shaman and a sacred sexuality practitioner.
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Posted June 28th, 2021:
I’m in negotiations with my postmodern boyfriend about him being my handler for National Organization, which we are collectively agreeing to help reform with dharmic values (one of my requirements for working with National Organization into the post-Apocalypse society). I will tell you about dharma someday and you won’t get mad at me.
He wants to help me get out of my torture situation, is what he appears to be telling me.
He could be one of several people, tbh. That’s how postmodern. Really, I don’t currently have a boyfriend. I’m lonely and stranded.
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Posted June 28th, 2021:
1. When there’s a screaming emergency (i.e. a valid crisis situation) we need to either a) solve the problem at hand or b) have a productive argument. It’s important to know how to argue (some people call this fighting, which feels more confrontational, which is sometimes okay, I think). I’m feeling good about arguments that end with us understanding each other’s situation, position, perception, etc. better or that result in agreements to adjust going forward. I do not negotiate with terrorists, of course.
2. We can talk about a lot of things together. Apocalypse trauma things are going to come up. We can talk about past trauma, including regrets. It’s good to keep that to short, winding, feelings sprints and then smile at each other and play and bond a little, remind each other “I’m here. I like you”. Don’t think I wouldn’t want to see you in person if you have a true vision of us having something that way.
3. Maybe some of us need legitimate cuddles?
4. Evil is off-limits. I want us to agree on that. Evil ruins everything.
5. Pedophilia as a practice or interest of any kind is evil, and I’m trying to help culture get away from the abuse of children. Are you? I remember living in a world where I thought most people were above evil things like violent crime, terrorism, predatory human trafficking, extreme bullying, and pointless cruelty, and I liked that.
6. People are not interchangeable. Attention isn’t even interchangeable.
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